AHHHH!!! I'm So Stressed! Pt II: The Band Aid

Side Note

While challenging the status quo is always an option, it is not the choice of many families. With that said, we need to learn how to manage stress.  There are so many children today with "anger issues", that the term is more part of pop psychology, than anything else. From my perspective, it's a lot of ordinary children, under an unusual amount of stress, who become anxious and irritable, and we pay attention when they get angry. This seems a bit more like "life issues", rather then "anger issues". Regardless of the cause, children need to learn how to manage their thoughts and feelings, in a socially appropriate manner. This skill set falls under that umbrella of executive functioning, specifically behavior regulation. Read on to see how to put the band aid on, and hope it's made from pretty durable material!

Mindfulness

Mindfulness has roots in Buddhism, but most religions incorporate some type of prayer or meditation technique that help deflect worry, and enjoy the moment. Mindfulness can be defined as “paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment and non-judgmentally.” Basic mindfulness begins with paying attention to your breath, in order to focus on the here and now.  Other techniques include attention to body sensations, sensory experiences, and emotions. All of these forms of mindfulness share focused attention, acceptance, and non-judgment. Practicing mindfulness can lower blood pressure, decrease anxiety, improve sleep, and alleviate gastrointestinal difficulties. It has also been shown to have a positive impact on children with various mental health challenges.

4 Easy Steps

1.   Sit on a straight back chair, or cross legged on the floor

2.    Focus on an aspect of your breathing (air flow, belly rising, exhale, etc)

3.    Once your concentration has narrowed, begin to be aware of sounds, sensations, and ideas

4.    Embrace each though or sensation without judgment, if your mind races, refocus on breathing, and then expand awareness

(helpguide.org)

Breathing

Each of us has the ability to feel calmer, more relaxed, and alert by engaging in “conscious breathing”.  When children focus on deep breathing, they can move out of the sympathetic nervous system (fight/flight) to the parasympathetic nervous system (relaxation/receptivity). The following  exercises help to develop this breathing in children.

Flower Breath:

Imagine smelling a beautiful flower, breathing in through your nose, and out through your mouth.  Stop and smell the roses, daisies, tulips, or any other flower.

Hissing Breath:

Breathe in through your nose, and exhale through your mouth, making a hissing sound. Extending the exhale allows children to slow down!

Bear Breath:

Inhale through the nose, pause, and exhale through the nose.  Breathe in for 3-4 seconds, pause for 2 seconds, and exhale. Repeat a few times to help ground and settle children.

Bunny Breath:

Three quick sniffs in the nose, and one long exhale through the nose. Children can do this while pretending to search for carrots. This is great for when children are upset and can’t find their breath.

(move-with-me.com)