The Homework Woes...

"I hate homework. I hate it more now than I did when I was the one lugging the textbooks and binders back and forth from school. The hour my children are seated at the kitchen table, their books spread out before them, the crumbs of their after-school snack littering the table, is without a doubt the worst hour of my day."  

                                         -Ayelet Waldm

Homework is an unfortunate right of passage in childhood. We have all avoided it, hated it, not turned it in, and ultimately completed it. With the academic pressures of school being introduced at younger ages, the struggle over homework completion now begins in kindergarten or 1st grade. Before children can read the words "executive functioning", we are expecting them to demonstrate attention, task initiation, persistence, planning, and organization.

The Environment
We may not be able to control our children's moods and attitudes, but we can optimize their surroundings. Create a homework space. This should be quiet, free of distractions, unplugged, and well stocked with supplies. Try to incorporate your children's favorite color schemes, artwork, and knick- knacks. Ball chairs, standing desks, and beanbags are a great way to address sensory needs. Sometimes classical music or nature sounds provide a relaxing ambiance. 

The Work
It is important to make sure the work coming home is appropriate for your children's abilities level, which likely will vary. Just because your older son needed challenge homework in 3rd grade, does not mean your daughter will be the same student. Homework is for practice, to reinforce what skills are being learned. It should NOT be a form of parental torture which gives you flashbacks to your own struggles in school! Communicate with the teacher, and complete what feels reasonable given your children's attention, stamina, and skill set. 

The Strategies
Homework is an expectation, but it can be tied to desirable, immediate, rewards and celebrations. Sometimes the anxiety starts when children feel overwhelmed, and don't know what to tackle first. Create a homework "to do" list, starting with hardest, easiest, most enjoyable, or whatever order you decide will be most desirable. Some children, not all, like to try and beat the clock. Set goals around how long assignments should take, and see how far they get. Using visuals, like a dry erase board, post its, or coloring activity, help children recognize how far they have come, and what remains. Take a break! Sometimes the end just seems too far away, or unattainable. Build in short breaks (age dependent) that include movement, positive attention, food, water, and/or games. Besides homework being completed, and ready to turn in, what else is in it for them? We get a paycheck at work, and bonuses for going above and beyond.  Get creative! You can make homework bucks to be used towards buying sought after toys, or celebrations, like extra minutes to stay up on the weekend, a sleep over, favorite meal, trip to the pool, or other highly valued ways to spend time.  Some children need more immediate reinforcement, so you can set up a scaffold of rewards and celebrations to be earned that evening. Given the volume and difficulty of homework today, even the most motivated of children, need more than the satisfaction of a good grade.